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I don’t wanna live
I don’t wanna breathe
‘les I feel you next to me
you take the pain I feel
waking up to you never felt so real
I don’t wanna sleep
I don’t wanna dream
’cause my dreams don’t comfort me
The way you make me feel
Waking up to you never felt so real

I hate living without you
Dead wrong to ever doubt you
But my demons lay in waiting
Tempting me away
Oh how I adore you
Oh how I thirst for you
Oh how I need you

- Comatose by Skillet

Isn’t it amazing how music can get into your head like nothing else can? I don’t just mean getting stuck in your head (though that’s certainly the case as well), but rather, the way music can speak to you the way that nothing else does. The way you can hear a song and think “That’s totally how I feel,” or “Wow, he/she/they are right!” Music calms, inspires, soothes, emboldens, and empassions us. It incites action, inspires contemplation, ignites discussion, and provokes meditation. The right song can convey thoughts that we’d be hard pressed to put to words.

The song above is the title track from Skillet’s latest album. Rebirthing, a song by Skillet that I previously mentioned is also on this album. I bought Rebirthing a while on the iTunes Music Store, but for whatever reason I didn’t buy the album at the time after previewing the rest of the tracks. Well, I recently bought the whole album (I needed new music – the ITMS is a dangerous thing in this regard), and I wish I hadn’t waited so long. It’s great.

It’s been an intense week already; things have just been happening all over the place. Nothing too exciting in my life, but seeing what’s going on around me is insane. Shane and Erika, who lead my community group, had their baby this past Friday night (their second). Ordinarily, this wouldn’t be too crazy (she was due in about 10 days), except for the fact that she had the baby at home. Now granted, people were having babies long before there were hospitals and OB/GYNs. This time, however, the plan wasn’t to have the baby at home. Basically, by the time they realized she was going to have the baby, it was far too late to get to the hospital, so she delivered it at home. Fortunately, the paramedics got there in time to do the delivery, and everything went well. Erika and their new baby girl, Tegan McKenna, came home from the hospital Saturday night, less than 24 hours after they’d been admitted.

I got to see Tegan tonight at community group, and she is adorable. And tiny. Really tiny. And as far as babies go, she’s not that small. I actually haven’t been around a newborn before, so I really have no concept of what they’re like. I even got to hold her, which I think makes her the first baby I’ve ever held. It’s kinda crazy. I can’t even imagine what it would be like to be a new dad, holding your child for the first time. I definitely want to have a family someday, but for now I can say I’m glad that I don’t yet. I’m not ready to be a dad yet, though I think most people feel that way right up until they actually are. It’s still crazy stuff.

The other big thing this week was my friends Gene and Kristie’s wedding. They had a beautiful outdoor ceremony Saturday afternoon. There were about 150 people, so it was pretty small, and it was set in a gorgeous, intimate, secluded area of one of the local country clubs. They looked so happy, and everything went very well. The crazy part of all of this was the fact that they met each other last August, got engaged in October, and married in March. I think things will work out well though. I know it wasn’t a decision either of them made lightly, and they both feel like this is the person that God has brought to them. I’m happy for them.

And that’s not all, just the most radical things. Friends getting engaged, looking into buying houses, moving, getting ready to have their own baby, stepping into leadership roles in the church, starting new jobs, wrestling with who they are and what God wants for their lives, and always trying to figure out how this all works. If there’s one thing that’s becoming clear to me, it’s the continuous nature of change.

I can’t believe I’ve been in California for 9 months already. I find myself thinking (and occasionally saying) things that I didn’t think I’d be saying for a long time, like “It seems like just yesterday that…” or “The weeks just fly by.”

I must be getting old.

(Though I can take solace in the fact that most of my friends out here are older than me – a fact that I rarely let them forget <grin>)